Gratitude and appreciation are essential ingredients for a happy and healthy marriage. They not only strengthen the bond between partners but also promote emotional growth and well-being. In this article, we will explore the importance of cultivating appreciation in your marriage and how it can lead to a more fulfilling relationship.
The Importance of Appreciation and Affection
Appreciation and affection are the first key habit among the six key relationship habits for strong marriages, which also include commitment, positive communication, time together, strong coping skills, and spiritual well-being. Being actively grateful is linked to higher levels of joy, optimism, and positive emotions. Feeling valued and appreciated by your spouse is a major indicator of a happy, healthy marriage. Affection is demonstrated through words and actions and communicates care, support, and love.
Gratitude vs. Appreciation
Gratitude is the recognition of your spouse’s graciousness and appreciation for it, while thankfulness is the external expression of gratitude. Research mainly focuses on gratitude because it’s easier to operationalize and more amenable to self-report. However, appreciation is a more rewarding quality to develop in terms of improving self-value and relationships. It involves opening your heart to feel the improvement in your experience that the presence of someone or something brings and engenders admiration of those whom you appreciate.
Showing Appreciation in Marriage
Showing appreciation in marriage is simple and can be done through daily opportunities, acknowledging everyday things, and learning how your spouse receives thankfulness. Gary Chapman’s five love languages – physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, and acts of service – can help you understand how your spouse prefers to receive appreciation. By practicing gratitude and appreciation, you can strengthen your marriage and foster a deeper connection with your partner.
Overcoming Inhibitors of Gratitude and Appreciation
The major inhibitors of gratitude for adults are guilt, shame, and entitlement. People with little gratitude tend to appear to others as entitled and may frame desires as “emotional needs” that their partners must meet. Overcoming guilt and shame of gratitude failures can lead to stronger love and emotional growth. By focusing on appreciation and actively expressing it in your marriage, you can overcome these inhibitors and create a more loving and supportive relationship.
